I haven’t felt very creative or inspired as of late. Actually several months now. Just really been on autopilot, going through motions.
But, I have been reading a lot of material on boundaries. Several different sources which I will happily list at the end of this reflection.
I have been talking with a therapist trying to work some pretty important things out. Self-work if you will.
My therapist heavily uses client-centered Gestalt theory.
I know this because my minor in college was psychology; I’ve studied 500 and 600 level classes. But while I do know a few things sometimes you need a push.
This is where therapy comes in.
During a recent visit she asked, “Do you think maybe you have a problem with boundaries?”
If you mean do I often avoid confrontation and become paralyzed by raised voices and the fear of making someone angry….yes
If you mean I have very often apologized to someone that has treated me badly when I did nothing…yes
If you mean my wants, desires, needs get put on back burner because of my perception of disappointment or fear of conflict with others…yes
As you can probably surmise this has been a lightbulb moment.
My husband, bless him, a wise man pointed this very thing out and scratched his head more than once long before this therapist.
We are working on a few things.
But I’m mostly working on me and still Reaching for Daylight.